Lesson of the day

File this one under "learned the hard way:"

Just because a cold medicine doesn't list a specific "will put you to sleep" ingredient in its nighttime version doesn't mean it won't still put you to sleep if you take it at 10 in the morning.

:P

We're all sick here. Abby started it with a high fever over the weekend; she also stopped eating much during the day and was nursing like mad at night to make up for it. Now Dan and I (and my mom) have wicked colds--the same stupid cold we all had back in March. Bah! I haven't had time to write all week because Abby's been such a handful, and now my head is so full of snot I don't think there's any room for creative words. Haven't had a chance to read the next chapter of Metamorpha either, but as soon as I do I'll post my blogs about it and a new message on the Metamorpha.com community board.

Hope you're all having a better week than I....

Change in plans

Hey, if you'd like to join me in reading and studying Metamorpha: Jesus as a Way of Life (see the post from yesterday for more details) then join the thread on the Metamorpha.com discussion board that I started today. Go to Metamorpha.com, become a member if you aren't one yet (it's free), click on Community, then on "the individual in formation", then on the general folder, then look for the "Reading through Metamorpha" thread. I figure this will be easier than trying to discuss the book through comments on blogs. And don't forget to let me know if you'll be posting on your blog about what you're reading in the book so I can add you to my Metamorpha list.

Where did I get that idea?

Metamorpha Chapter 1 Blogmap: Try to pinpoint the traits, both good and bad, that come from the religious tradition you grew up with or are currently in.

I belong to the first generation of people who grew up in a seeker church. For those of you who've never heard that term, a "seeker church" is a church that is geared towards reaching non-Christians. Now, every Christian is charged with the great commission--spreading the gospel--but seeker churches take it a step further by programming their entire service around making non-Christians feel welcome through the kind of music and media used (and the kinds of overtly religious symbolism they leave out) and by teaching entry-level lessons on the faith.

Thinking back to how that experience shaped my spiritual beliefs, I realize that the concept of spiritual formation wasn't addressed much at all. The emphasis was on what Christianity is, what it believes, and why people should be Christians--which makes sense, given the expected audience. The sermons focused on living in a Christian way and how that manifests itself in your relationships, marriage, financial practices, etc. As a result, I know a lot about the application of the faith, but very little on the development of it.

There are a lot of things I learned through my seeker-church years that I don't really believe anymore. I came to believe that the more traditional forms of worship--singing hymns, reciting creeds, praying prayers that were written out by someone else (like in a prayer book)--were either insufficient (though for what, I don't know), ineffective, or just plain wrong. No one ever said this, but I think the fact that they were omitted completely was enough of a lesson. I came to believe that there must be a specific day to which a Christian can point and say, "That's when I became a Christian." I also came to believe that church is a place where people come to become Christians, and not just a place where Christians come to grow and be taught. It's hard to admit that I think I was mistaught; I don't like to shed a poor light on a movement that led to my entire family being Christian today. But every movement has its faults.

Obviously I learned things there that I am grateful for having been taught. For example, I am pretty well-versed in the defense of the faith. I know the basic doctrine. I know the support for the Bible that allows us to be confident in its truth and teaching. I know how to integrate my faith into my everyday life and not compartmentalize my faith.

It's interesting, now, being a mom and being in charge of facilitating the spiritual development of another person. I'm much more aware of how the way I approach my faith will permanently impact my child. I think of the things I was raised to believe, the traditions we held or did not hold, the ways my parents demonstrated their faith, and I think about how Dan and I will do things the same or differently from them. And it hits me just how immense the responsibility is. The responsibility for churches is uthe same: immense. Guess that's why the Bible has that passage about leaders and teachers being held to a higher standard.

Metamorpha

On the days that I write, I spend the first hour of my "writing time" studying. I'm going through four different books at the moment: The Portable Seminary, Following Jesus by N.T. Wright, The Bible, and my brother's first book, Metamorpha. I started Metamorpha today, even though I edited the whole thing last summer, because reading for editing and reading for edification are two very different things. Back then I read for grammar and cohesion and organization; today I read because I've known for so many years that my spiritual life is anemic and whithering and I just didn't know why.

One sentence stuck out to me and really hit home: "The Christian life is not living out how we already see; it is a journey of redemption." It's not about walking through the door of conversion and being done. It's not about simply turning our back on certain beliefs and actions. It's about constant, unending, Spirit-led change: a journey that ends only when we go Home. You're not done when you pray the sinner's prayer; you're just starting.

On one level I have always known this. Of course there's more to it than just that quick prayer--there's the daily struggle against the flesh, against sin, blah blah blah. But if there's supposed to be a relationship with God, then there should be more than just struggle, right? A life of nothing but fighting can't be all the Christian life is supposed to be.

Having read Metamorpha already, I know what's coming up, and I know that reading it is going to change me--thank heavens, it's about time! But I don't want to do it alone. I'm inviting you to join me.

Kyle has written a curriculum that is available--free!--from the book's website. (Click on "dowloads" at the top.) I'm going to read a chapter a week and go through the curriculum, and then post to the blog about what I've read. (Part of each lesson actually includes blog ideas--how cool is that?) If you'd like to do the same, let me know and I'll set up a whole new list of links to every participating blog, so we can all read each other's repsonses and leave comments of insight and encouragement for each other. (A leader's guide is also available, so if you're in a small group that is looking for a new study, point your leader to Metamorpha!)

I really hope some of you will come along with me on this journey. Roadtrips are always more fun with a crowd. :) And I pray that God uses this book and this experience to renew your spiritual life and breath fresh air into your relationship with him.

Time to read...and morph!

A Bigger Life

Even though my official blog is temporarily out of order, I'm still posting the Christian Fiction Blog Alliance posts there because...well, because I am, so there. Anywayhttp://www2.blogger.com/img/gl.link.gif, I wanted to direct your attention to the post I put up there today on this week's selection, A Bigger Life by Annette Smith. I haven't been reading the books for CFBA lately because I just don't have the time, but I'd heard from my agent that this was a really good one, so I took the opportunity for a free book--and boy am I glad I did! A really great story--devoured it in two days and wept at the end. Always a good sign, if you ask me. :)

Band geek? Choir snob? Primadonna ballerina? The possibilities are endless!

We've known since she was tiny that Abby enjoyed music, but to see a talent for it emerging when she's still so young has been really amusing. Three cases in point:

She "sings" now and then in this high breathy voice without a lot of enunciation, and lately she's started to actually mimic musical patterns, albeit just two notes in a row, but still. She's been spot-on with pitch a couple times, too. And she's got rhythm, I think, anyway-she's been clapping along with songs lately.

She loves playing the musical toys we have: drum and tambourine and pianos. And Dan just got Guitar Hero for his Xbox, and she actually drags the guitar over to him when he's not playing so that he'll start, and she pushes the buttons and claps along with the songs. Sometimes he puts the guitar on her and they "play" the game together--I'll have to get my camera out next time he plays in case they do it again and she holds still; it's so cute to see her with the guitar on!

Dan also got Dance Dance Revolution. For those of you unfamiliar with the game, go to this video and check it out before reading the rest of this so you appreciate just how adorable this was. (The screen on the right is what comes up on the TV; you step on the arrows on the pad that correspond with the arrows on the TV as they reach the top row. This little boy in the video, by the way, is about a hundred times better than I am. I'm not sure which is sadder: that a 5-year-old is more coordinated than me, or that a 5-year-old has spent that much time in front of a TV. At least he's not sedentary.) I was playing it and Dan and Abby were hanging out. Abby kept walking around the pad and watching me. Then she went to Dan's bookshelf, pulled out a large workbook, placed it on the ground behind me, then stood on it and began stomping her feet around as she watched me.

So, which one will she go for in the end, I wonder? Instruments, which we hope to start her on early, either violin or piano, or singing, which she'll certainly get exposed to a lot thanks to my inability to hear a song I know and not sing along, or dancing, which I'd also like to get her involved in eventually? I'll have to make a guess and record it in her baby book and see in ten years which way she leans...

Coming up for air

I can't tell you how many thousands of pages I've read over the last month. I just finished another book--let's see, that makes...*counting*...5 books since the beginning of March? No, forgot Jane Eyre--6 books. And three of them had over 800 pages. Egads. Anyway, I'm taking a breather before diving into another book (that Outlander series has me SO addicted--I swear they must dust the covers with crack or something) to do a little blog updating. I know you're thrilled.

In the Abby department:
At her 15 month well-check the doctor said Abby's verbal development is in the 18-24 month range, which doesn't much surprise me. Apparently the 18 month well-check is mostly a language screening, so she said we could skip it and just come in for her 24 month. I was so proud--it felt like having your kid's teacher tell you she can skip the next grade. :)

She has discovered the joy of shrieking. 'Nuff said.

New words include "more" (which she's been signing for months but she now signs and says) and "aw-riiiight!", which is REALLY cute. She does "wow' sometimes, too, in this breathless voice that sounds like she's truly awed. She also says "ff, ff" when you ask what dogs say--not quite right, I know, but I see why she'd say that and it works for me.

In the writing department:
I've started chapter 4 in my current WIP and have to say I am quite pleased with my progress so far. I have a group of friends who offered to be my test market for the first 3 chapters, and the feedback so far has been helpful and encouraging. All the reading I've been doing has been paying off, too; I can tell the voices from some of the characters I've been reading and the styles of some of the authors are rubbing off on me, in a good way. Don't forget, all you wannabe writers: READ READ READ!!!

All my Rita award stuff is in, and Dan and I have decided to go to the award ceremony in Dallas this July. This means Abby will be staying with my parents for the weekend we're gone--my stomach is already in knots. It also means we'll need to have her night-weaned by then. Having just done the day-weaning and feeling like we're finally good in that department, I've gotta say I'm nervous about this next step. Partly because I know it's not gonna happen without tears, and not just regular tears but nighttime while-everyone-is-trying-to-sleep tears, which means we're in for some rough nights. But also because, as much as it annoys me sometimes, I love nursing Abby. I love the connection. I love that I can give her something no one else can. I love that she's comforted by it--I know now why she's never attached to a "lovie", it's because *I* am her lovie! Well, a specific part of me, in reality, but still, it's kind of a package deal, and I'd like to think that the rest of me gives her comfort, too. And once we stop, that's it with her, that connection is gone forever. It's breaking my heart, but I know it has to be done, and not just because of the trip, but because I don't want to nurse when I'm pregnant and we're hoping that will be a reality soon, too; the trip is just giving us a more definite deadline. *sigh* Okay, so that wasn't really writing-related, I got a little carried away, sorry.

Well, Abby's at my feet begging for "uppie!" so I'm off to be a mom. And then read some more. I'm already feeling the withdrawal....

He's Alive!

He is risen, amen! My earliest memory of contemporary Christian music is Don Francisco's song, "He's Alive!" I haven't heard it in years, but the lyrics still stir me. Go here to hear the recording, or read the lyrics below, and ponder the wonder and miracle of Easter.

The gates and doors were barred
And all the windows fastened down
I spent the night in sleeplessness
And rose at every sound
Half in hopeless sorrow
And half in fear the day
Would find the soldiers breakin' through
To drag us all away

And just before the sunrise
I heard something at the wall
The gate began to rattle
And a voice began to call
I hurried to the window
Looked down into the street
Expecting swords and torches
And the sound of soldiers' feet

But there was no one there but Mary
So I went down to let her in
John stood there beside me
As she told me where she'd been
She said they might have moved Him in the night
And none of us knows where
The stone's been rolled away
And now His body isn't there

We both ran toward the garden
Then John ran on ahead
We found the stone and empty tomb
Just the way that Mary said
But the winding sheet they wrapped Him in
Was just an empty shell
And how or where they'd taken Him
Was more than I could tell

Oh something strange had happened there
Just what I did not know
John believed a miracle
But I just turned to go
Circumstance and speculation
Couldn't lift me very high
'Cause I'd seen them crucify him
Then I saw him die

Back inside the house again
The guilt and anguish came
Everything I'd promised Him
Just added to my shame
When at last it came to choices
I denied I knew His name
And even if He was alive
It wouldn't be the same

But suddenly the air was filled
With a strange and sweet perfume
Light that came from everywhere
Drove the shadows from the room
And Jesus stood before me
With his arms held open wide
And I fell down on my knees
And I just clung to Him and cried

Then He raised me to my feet
And as I looked into His eyes
The love was shining out from Him
Like sunlight from the skies
Guilt in my confusion
Dissappeared in sweet release
And every fear I'd ever had
Just melted into peace

He's alive yes He's alive
Yes He's alive and I'm forgiven
Heaven's gates are open wide
He's alive yes He's alive
Oh He's alive and I'm forgiven
Heaven's gates are open wide
He's alive yes He's alive
Hallelujah He's alive
He's alive and I'm forgiven
Heaven's gates are open wide
He's alive He's alive He's alive
I believe it He's alive
Sweet Jesus

Please act!

Those of you who read my blog regularly know that nutrition has become a big issue for me--as in, an issue I champion and discuss often, not an issue as in it's a problem. (Well, actually, it still is a problem--old habits are hard to break, ya know! But that's not what I mean.) Well, I found out today that the FDA is trying to pass legislation which will make supplements illegal. High-quality supplements have been a huge part of my successful weight loss and continuing health, and are practically the only way my mom is keeping her hypoglycemia at bay. If the FDA gets its way, supplements--as well as natural health therapies--will be classified as medicine, meaning only doctors can dispense or practice them. People like my nutritionist, who was able to get to the bottom of my mom's health problems when doctors could not, will not be able to sell them anymore, nor will your local health food store.

If you're not into natural remedies, then that's fine, but I would still ask that you help keep them an option for those of us who rely on them. Please go to this petition and sign it, then forward it to your friends and family. If you have a blog, please post a quick article and the link and ask your readers to sign it, too. The FDA has bowed to public pressure in the past--please do your part to make them do it again!