Today was my first day officially back in the writing saddle. I wrote for nearly three hours. Turns out I had about 2 pages of my old chapter 6, so I worked on those and then jumped into writing from scratch, which I've been really avoiding and just plain fearing for a few weeks now. I kept feeling like I'd been away from the story for so long that I wouldn't be able to get back into it, or that I just wouldn't be excited about it anymore. But God sent me in a new direction and gave me some new material that I really liked, and I ended up finishing the chapter right at 4 PM, which is what I'd told Dan I'd write to.
When I went downstairs at 4, I felt like a new woman. It was unbelievable. I had so much more patience with Abby, I was in a great mood, I had all this energy--and I realized that I always feel like that when I've gotten in a good block of writing time. I was trying to pin it down and explain it to Dan--was it because I felt like my time had been productive? Or because I was being creative? Or because I had three hour all to myself? And in the end I realized that it was because I was doing what God has called me to do. God made me a writer. He gave me this passion and gives me these stories and characters, and regardless of how frustrating or difficult or slow-going the writing may be on any given day, I always feel renewed when I'm done.
And that's not to say God didn't call me to motherhood. I think parenting is a whole 'nuther kind of call, though. Plus, the results are a LONG time in coming; at least at the end of the day I can see how much I've written. It will be years before I'm able to see all the ways I invested in my kids and how they benefited from their time with me.
Anyway, I feel like I'm "back", you know? Good thing, seeing as I have that contract. :)