Violette Between<,/i> blog tour!

So this week, Wednesday-Friday, is the official blog tour for Violette Between. There are around 60 people posting, I think, so I’m really excited to see how my rankings go. If you’d like to participate, please email me and I’ll send you the necessary links. Props to my peeps at the Christian Fiction Blog Alliance for taking part, and a special thank you to all the folks in the blogosphere who’ve jumped on board to help out.

My New Blogging Home

I'm packing up this blog and shuffling it to a new location, so please change your bookmarks and links if you've got a link on your blog to mine. My new blogging home is:

blog.alisonstrobel.com

All the content from this blog has been transferred and from now on I'll be blogging there. Abby's blog (gobabymorrow.blogspot.com) will stay where it is, though.

See you there!

Transparancy

I'm working, in fits and starts, on books three and four simultaneously. So far I don't have a contract for either one, so I'm not as motivated as I should be to write, plus Dan and I started a home business about which I'll blog once we get a website up, so time for writing has been sparse. But I had a big breakthrough on book four the other day, and I was able to write the entire intro and get it sent off to my agent so he has something to send out with the proposal.

What's weird is that both books are autobiographical. I didn't plan it that way, but they are. Book three's main character is based on me, much more than Grace was in "Worlds Collide," and book four's main character IS me, because it's my spiritual autobiography. So I find myself baring my soul through two different faces, one real and one fictional, and all the exposure of my self is starting to stress me out.

I gave my mom the intro to the spiritual autobiography because she always reads my stuff before anyone else does. After I sent it off to her, though, I panicked, because, in the interest of honesty and integrity to the story, I'd been brutally honest about the not-so-Christian activities I'd engaged in during high school and college, and it dawned on me that she might not know about all of them. And then I realized that complete strangers are going to read this stuff someday, and do I really want them to know how stupid I was? I keep reminding myself that this stuff happened years ago--some of it literally half my lifetime ago--and who on earth doesn't have a closetful of memories from their teens and 20's that just make them groan? But I feel like I have that whole Strobel image to maintain, that people will read the book and go "Lee Strobel's daughter did that? Didn't he teach her anything?" when of course it had nothing to do with him and everything to do with me. I'm struggling, too, with how much I tell about other people, because everyone's story is their own, and I don't feel right telling someone else's, but when they intersect with yours, you can't help but reveal some of their's as well.

The third book is about me, too, like I said, but in a different way. It's about a me that could have been, had God not plucked me out of the mire of my own stupidity. When I outlined it I kept thinking, "Yeah, I would have done that--yikes;" "Yeah, I would have been that addicted/stupid/wounded." It's scary to think what I might have been like, but then I realized that I'm STILL like that--it's just that God's grace has covered over those parts and allowed me to travel a different path than the one to which my natural compass points me. Praise God for grace!

Under 150!

Well, I've hit a pleasing milestone: I'm officially under 150 pounds. Not by much, but I don't care how many numbers come after the decimal as long as the numbers before it are in the 140's. walking is going well, although it's starting to be too hot to go at my normal time. I think we're going to have to start going earlier, which sucks, because I'm just not a morning person. But a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do, right?

Dream On

I've blogged before about my bizarre dreams, and last night I had yet another one that I thought might amuse the general public. I was back in Arlington Heights, IL, where I grew up, and while waiting for an elevator at one of the big condo high-rises, I ran into Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. We ended up in the same elevator and started talking, and Angelina and I really hit it off. They invited me to come to dinner with them, which I did, and while we were eating Angelina asks, "Hey, what's that song that starts..." and she says the first line of a worship song. (I've been wracking my brain all morning trying to remember what song it was, but haven't figured it out yet.) So I sing it and she's all, "Yeah, that's the one!" So she starts singing it and I start singing the harmony, and she says, "Hey, would you sing that at our wedding?" Of course I said yes. Then the scene changes and we're in the gated community where my parents live, and this is apparently where they live, too. (Why they were visiting Arlington Heights, I don't know.) We're hanging out at their house and they want to take Maddox to Disneyland. (I don't know where the girl was she adopted in real life; she was never in the dream. Angelina was pregnant, though.) So we take a limo to Disneyland and there's this big group of their friends there and they have me take their picture, which I do. Then the scene changes again and it's the day of their wedding. It's really casual; the guys aren't in tuxes or anything, and I can't remember what Angelina was wearing, but I don't think it was even a dress. She was putting it on and complaining about how nothing ever fits her right, so I tell her I'm learning how to sew (sort of true in real life) and that, once I figure out how to tailor clothes, I'd be happy to help her out, for which she's all grateful. Then we're at the wedding reception and I'm at the head table with them, just hanging out, and they ask me what I'm going to tell the press when they ask me for details. I tell them I'll talk about how down-to-earth they are (which they were; very normal--and I was so proud of myself in the dream for not getting all melty around Brad), and about how much they love and respect each other. Oh--and Angelina mentioned something about being in the new X-Men movie as "Medina." *shrug*

So that was my night last night: hanging out (and supposedly singing, although that part never happened) at the Brangelina wedding. Not a bad way to spend an evening.

Just a bunch of riff-raff

Well, it turns out 9:15 is just a little too late to get in line to be in the Ellen DeGeneres audience. We would have made it had we been there at, say, 6:30, possibly even 7:00 this morning. But despite the fact that I was up at 4:45, that wouldn't have been possible. But hey, we still ended up in the riff-raff room, and Ellen came through there and danced with us, and I got to give her a hi-five, so that was cool. And I got a t-shirt and 4 free (and completely random) CD's that had nothing to do with the show. Had we been in the audience we would have gotten a digital video recorder from Canon, Paul Simon's new CD, and a year's supply of Pantene. (Which is really weird, because I use Pantene, and as I was showering this morning at oh-dark-thirty I actually thought to myself, "Hey, wouldn't it be cool if they gave us a year's supply of Pantene??")

I got to Anna's hotel at 7:45, and we went to some little cafe for a quick breakfast. Then we hightailed it to the NBC studios and actually found a great parking spot. When we got to the main entrance we saw a sign that said "Ellen DeGeneres Line Starts Here." And there was NO ONE there. We foolishly though we were the first ones in line, but the audience coordinator Anna had talked to on the phone said not to get there before 9, so to us it made sense. OS we gloated for a while, then some other folks showed up, and then the audience coordinator showed up and said, "Sorry folks, we've already filled the audience for today. I brought a huge group in around 9 this morning. (Turns out THREE HUNDRED PEOPLE had been there by 9 AM. Some had started lining up in the middle of the night!) Then he gave us a laminated number card and said to come back at 2:30 to get into the riff-raff room.

So off we went to Santa Monica to kill time, and then we came back at 1:30 just to be safe. Then, for the next THREE AND A HALF HOURS we stood around (STOOD, literally) watching Ellen reruns on the monitors and chatting with other riff-raff-bound folks. (And two lucky girls who knew someone on staff and got into the audience.) Once we got into the riff-raff room, though, it was pretty fun. We danced and Ellen came through, and they kept throwing t-shirts out and then passing out the stacks of CDs for whatever reason. Oh--the guests were Diane Keaton, Sherri Shepherd, and Paul Simon. We misunderstood earlier information (or it was miscommunicated--I actually am leaning towards that, given some of the other information issues we ran into) and thought Clinton and Bush, Sr. would be there too, but it turns out she'd been in New Orleans with them last week and interviewed them, and they just showed clips of that.

By 7 PM when we finally left we were flat-out exhausted, but it was definitely an adventure, and heaven knows I don't get to do a lot of adventuring today, so that was cool. I left her a card and a copy of Violette Between, so hopefully she'll get a chance to read it. Abby was a perfect angel for her Daddy today, so that made it a little easier to be away from her, although at one point I almost started crying because I missed her so much. She was asleep when I got home but woke up about 20 minutes later, and for once I was happy she'd woken up early because I wanted so much to go in and cuddle her.

Now it's 9:45 PM and I am beyond tired, but Anna and her friend Marlene stayed in LA to meet up with another friend of Anna's for dinner, and she hasn't called yet to say they're on their way down, so I'm trying to keep myself awake for them. Not sure it's gonna happen. Sorry girls, you may be on your own tonight. :)

The Ellen DeGeneres Show!

So tomorrow (Wednesday) I'm going to the taping of Ellen's 500th show--and it airs on Thursday! To find out when it airs in your city, click here. No clue where we'll be sitting--can't even say for sure we'll get in; I don't know how this kind of thing works, but I don't think it's guaranteed--but I'll be wearing a beige crinkled blouse with long sleeves and brown/beige pants. My hair is a lot longer than what you see in my profile photo; it's pretty much at my shoulders now. We're getting there at 9 AM to get in line, and it tapes at two. The guests: Bill Clinton and George Bush, Sr.! I'm bringing a copy of the book for Ellen--think I should bring one for Hillary and Barbara, too?

Violette Between Releases Today!

When I signed my Waterbrook contract back in 2002, today seemed soooo far away. But there's nothing like getting married and having a baby to make the time fly by!

I hope that you all enjoy it--it's not a sequel to "Worlds Collide," although I do have plans for one in the future. "Violette Between" asks the question: If you had the opportunity to relive your time with someone you've lost to death--a spouse, a child--would you do it, even if it meant giving up your future?

For those of you in book clubs, this book will definitely give you a lot of fodder for conversation. And my website, alisonstrobel.com, lists some ways your book club can do a Q & A with me after you've read one of my books.

If you read it and like it, please give me an Amazon review--and of course, suggest it to your friends. :)

Happy reading!

Gas or Groceries

Filled the van on Wednesday to the tune of 63 bucks for 18 gallons. Talk about painful; I've never spent that much to fill my tank. *sigh* I remember like it was yesterday the days when I budgeted $12.50 a week to fill my little Saturn. I even commuted back then.

So now the Morrow family is playing the game, "How long can we make this tank last?" I did my part yesterday by walking to the grocery store, thus killing two birds with one stone: my morning walk and our need for food. (Well, my need anyway; seeing as Dan eats, like, two times a day, his food lasts a heck of a lot longer than mine. I'm about to pop meal #4 in the oven and it's only 4 PM.) I figured it couldn't be any farther than the 3 miles I usually walk, and the hills would only make it better for me, right? Well, I didn't think about the fact that the hills coming back are a lot worse than going there--coming back you go uphill twice. By the time I got home I barely had the energy to put the groceries in the fridge before collapsing on the sofa. And then today my shins, ankles, and feet were crying, "Why do you hate us??"

Our self-imposed house arrest actually works well for me. We have a tendency to turn every need to leave the house into an excuse for a multi-hour excursion, which means I hardly ever get done all the stuff I need to do at home. But now I can see myself finally getting to the end of some projects that have been lingering on my to do list for months. My poor agent and publicist who have been patiently waiting for replies from me are no doubt sighing with relief, and whaddyaknow, we're actually caught up on laundry! It almost makes me glad gas is so freaking expensive.

Almost.

Because I need more ways to proctastinate.

Apparently The Place To Be is on MySpace.com, but until Monday I'd never even set a virtual foot on that site to see what all the buzz was about. My brother convinced me to sign up because he said it would be a good marketing tool for my book, so I now have yet another patch of internet real estate to my name. Thing is, I've never felt so stupid about a website. I have no idea what I'm doing there. I can't figure out how to get rid of those blasted ads all over the place (or if I eve can get rid of them--but it doesn't seem like everyone else's space has as many as mine does), can't figure out how to change my url and blog addresses, can't figure out how it is that so many strangers are finding me and asking to be my friend. (And of course, because I'm such a mercy-person, I can't bear to turn anyone down and risk hurting their feelings, so I've got all these weird people listed as my friends.) I have, however, reconnected with three old high school acquaintances.

SO now i'm trying to figure out how to maximize this thing for book promotion. My brother suggested making banners of my books, but again, I've no idea how to do it. He said you can usually just find someone who has something you like and ask them to show you how to do it, but I feel a little funny doing that. He has a slide show of photos on his, so I might just put the files of my books into a little slide show. I don't know. Maybe if I sit down and really put some time into it I'll figure out how to make everything look cool like everyone else's. I'm not used to having to work that hard at figuring this kind of stuff out; it's annoying.

Anyway, if any of you are MySpacers, come find me and say hi so I can ask you to be my friend and get some more normal people in there. :)

If you know a diabetic...

...then check out my friend Melissa Cook's new blog. It's kind of a "day in the life of a diabetic" type thing. She found out she was diabetic kind of by a fluke, just over a year ago. She was pulled out of class and sent directly to the ER when the student health center ran a blood test she needed for something else--her blood sugar level was astronomically high and she didn't have any clue. It's been a heck of a year for her, having to alter her lifestyle so drastically and rapidly, and she's been really helpful to my mom and me as we try to live the same way so my mom's hypoglycemia doesn't turn into diabetes and I don't get hypoglycemia. Please pass her blog info on to those you know who might benefit from it--the more the merrier as we look for decent snack alternatives and commiserate about the agony of eating out. :)

This diabetic diet thing has been killing me lately. (Technically the total opposite is true, but you know what I mean.) I really have to bite the bullet and start forcing myself to try foods I haven't liked in the past--hummus, raw red and green peppers, etc. I'm just sooooo sick of the foods I've been eating the last couple months. It's paying off--I am down to 152, which means I've lost over 50 pounds--but I'm almost to the point where I just don't care anymore because the food side of it is so dang hard. I've been letting myself stay hungry way too long lately because I don't want to eat the stuff I have but I can't bring myself to eat the stuff I used to eat because so little of it even sounds good anymore. (A small victory, that--even cereal doesn't satisfy me the way it used to.) So after I finish lunch today, I'm going to go through the list of foods I'm allowed to eat and figure out what I'm willing to try. I'm afraid I'll end up buying stuff and not liking it and it'll go to waste, but I guess I have to take that chance if I'm going to keep this up. Hopefully the thought of setting Abby on the right path with give me the willpower I've been lacking...

They're here!

They arrived in four boxes stacked on the front step, and Dan, knowing how eagerly I awaited them, brought a box to my friend Tania's house where we were hanging out so I could slice it open and see them first. That's right, "Violette Between" is officially a book! Knowing that it's entirely too late to make any changes whatsoever, I can finally let go of this particular book and just accept that it is what it is, and try to be confident that whatever story God wanted me to tell, I told. And what a fitting reward for yesterday's achievement--I wrote for the first time since Abby's arrival. She took a 2.5 hour nap, during which I opened the outline for book #3, refrained from flagellating myself when I read how horrible it was, and began to rework it into something that an editor might actually consider the beginning of a decent work of fiction.

So now I turn to you, dear readers, and ask you to let me know if you happen to have any personal connections with bookstore owners/managers, directors of women's ministries, etc. who might help generate some buzz for the book if I send them a copy. And if you're in SoCal and know of anyplace that would like to host a reading/signing, let me know that, too!

Not "Death AND Taxes," but Death FROM Taxes

FOUR HOURS. That's how long it took us to do our taxes last night. Yeah, yeah, I know, major procrastination, but who cares as long as it's done by the 17th, right? And I tip my hat to the folks at Turbo Tax who, despite not including some really useful functions, have at least made it possible for the average person to do taxes without having a coronary or filing for divorce right after filing their 1040.

Even so, I nearly went on a killing spree driven by sheer frustration trying to sort receipts and calculate mileage and figure out WHY WHY WHY Turbo Tax makes you start entire sections over instead of letting you go back one screen half the time. We lost close to $500 in deductions thanks to some flaws in their software design, and while I tried desperately to figure out how to get them back, Abby decided it was time to scream and not be happy with anything we tried to do for her. You know, I think someone could run for president on the one-issue platform of MAJOR tax reform and win by a landslide. S/he'd have my vote. Truly, it's ridiculous that you need to either go to college or by computer software just to understand the stuff if you do more than your average 40 hour a week job. Try living the American dream by starting a business or being self-employed, and suddenly the American government is bludgeoning you over the head with eight million pages of tax law that you need to master if you want to get back every cent that you've the right to have. I have no problem paying taxes--I'm not an anarchist, I know we need a government, and taxes make it run--but when I get cheated out of my own money, I get a wee bit testy.

Anyway, after thinking last night about the nearly-guaranteed win for a candidate promising sweeping tax reform, my subconscious of course ran with the idea and made me dream that I was running for president. Oddly, though, my platform was based on restoring morality to our society and had nothing to do with taxes. Whatever. Anyway, it was cool doing the press conferences and debates with my competition.

Do you have any creative ideas for these?

I was all excited when we got back from Vegas last night (at midnight--oi!) because a box from Waterbrook was sitting on the front step. I thought for sure it was my advance copies of "Violette Between," but no, it was a box of about a hundred "Violette Between" covers. I got the same thing when "Worlds Collide" came out, and I'm still none the wiser on what the heck to do with them. I used the "Worlds Collide" ones as invitations to my book launch party, and they looked pretty cool, but I don't know if I'm doing a party this time, and even if I did I'd still have a ton left over. I really want to use them for SOMETHING--it seems like a waste to just let them sit in my office--and obviously the publisher thinks they'll be handy or else they wouldn't spend the money on them for me. I just wish they'd send a list of ideas with them! Last time I also received a box of about a thousand "Worlds Collide" postcards, and again, they just sat around because I didn't know what to do with them. I handed out about 20 to strangers at the CBA convention, and when I went to the Women of Faith convention I stood outside and handed them out to women as they entered the building, which used up probably two hundred or so. So, point being, I assume a box of "Violette Between" postcards (which are honest-to-goodness postcards, with a split down the center to separate the address section from the short book description and a "place stamp here" box in the upper corner) are on their way as well, and again I've no idea what to do with them.

So, my question to you is: What would you do with a box of 100 book covers and 1000 postcards? I am willing to spend a bit of money doing something with them--this is marketing, after all, and you've gotta be willing to put some money behind your book. The postcards don't have any space to write on the back, really, unless you write a message in the address section, in which case you're obviously not sending them anywhere. The book covers are blank, and they're the WHOLE cover, back and front, and are actual book size. (I sliced off the back part for the party invitations last year.)

Incentive: best idea gets a free copy of the book!

The Wagon

Well, I was on the wagon for quite a while. Sat towards the front, far from the edge where it's easier to fall off. But then the view out the sides caught my eye, and I moved to the back to get a better look, and wouldn't you know it--we hit a bump in the road and I toppled out.

Yes, I fell off the wagon.

And I didn't just fall. I fell hard. Twisted my ankle when I landed, and the only building on the side of the road was Carb Haven. What choice did I have? I hobbled in, sat at the counter, and had my fill.

Pizza. Soda. Bread. Chips. Chocolate. More chocolate. Sugar. Oh my.

But the wagon came back for me. The driver wrestled me from my seat, and tossed me back aboard, and took off, leaving Carb Haven in its dust. And after two days of eating the way I should, I lost the weight I'd put back on, and two more pounds besides.

49 pounds lost so far, in three months. Long may it last...

So irate I can't see straight.

This makes me so mad I don't know if I can even put my thoughts into coherent sentences. The gall some people have! Some people have apparently forgotten the whole reason women fought for equal rights: so women would have the right to choose whether or not they wanted to work outside the home!

Okay, the gist of the article is this: some professor named Linda Hirschman has written a book in which she asserts educated women are making a grave mistake by becoming stay-at-home moms. She says they can't possibly be satisfied by giving up their careers, and women who claim that they've never wanted to be anything but a homemaker are basically lying and fooling themselves.

You know, I just now remembered that in high school one of my classmates made this same claim--that women have an obligation to work. I was so stunned that someone would make a comment like that that I couldn't even respond, and I find myself in the same position now. It's just such an absurd, ridiculous, and offensive statement that all the arguments against it seem way too obvious to outline.

I feel doubly affronted, because Hirschman's claim is not just a direct criticism of my choices, but of my mother's as well--even more of a criticism of her than of me, in fact. I've always wanted to be a writer and a teacher, and I knew I wanted to be in the classroom, although I knew I wouldn't be there for the whole of my working years and would eventually be at home with my kids. But my mom is one of those women for whom Hirschman apparently has no respect: a woman who desired nthing else than to put her life into her family. Yeah, gosh, what a mistake--to want to dedicate yourself to raising your children, being there for them whenever they need you, supporting your husband and taking care of him and the home you share. I can say, as a child of a stay-at-home mom, that the security I felt knowing my mom was always there for me played a direct role in making my child as happy as it was. I always knew she was available in case I got hurt or sick at school; she was was always there when I came home in the afternoon to make me a snack and ask how my day was and listen to my lame school stories. When I was in a play at school or had a choir concert, she didn't have to juggle work or beg off with a "I promise I'll come to the next one, honey!" She was always there, and not many of my friends could say the same.

"Don't give it more time than it deserves," my husband just told me. He's right. This kind of crap naturally makes me want to go face-to-face with this chick and tell her off, but what's the point, really? She's not going to listen to me, because, in her eyes, I'm apparently missing a few screws--why else would an educated woman like myself choose to give up a successful teaching career for a shaky career that lets me stay home? But before I sign off, one last comment: make no mistake, I have nothing but respect for women who have to work. Sometimes putting your kids first means having to work outside the home, and I totally understand that. I'll admit I don't understand people who want to work rather than stay home and raise their kids, but hey, just because I don't understand it doesn't mean I'm going to knock it. Women's lib was about letting you make that choice, so you go ahead and make it however you want, just as I have. Just don't follow this woman's poor lead and look down on those of us who ahve chosen the home as our office.

Religious Freedom

It doesn't matter if you think Christianity is true or not, this case isn't about a specific religion--it's about religious freedom in general. Go to this site and you can send a letter to Pres. Bush asking him to intervene. Who knows if he'll be able to do anything, but it can't hurt. No one should be put on trial for refusing to convert--Islam, Christian, Pagan, whatever.

Week Six Check In and a Nutrition Lesson

Here's a little nugget of information for you: did you know that eating the same food over and over for a long period of time can cause your body to become allergic to it? That's what I learned at the nutritionist this week when I gave her my food diary for the lats three weeks and she saw that my breakfast is always peanut butter on toast and an apple, my lunch is always eggs with cheese, my dinner (when we're not out to eat) is always turkey and provalone. "Ohhh, we need some variety here," she said. Thing is, the fact that I'm not eating Cheerios at all three meals like I sometimes did during my pregnancy means that, to me, I am eating a variety of foods.

So I'm a little frustrated, because the booklet she gave me that outlines all the foods I can have didn't have much in it that I actually like--in fact, peanut butter, toast, apples (or sometimes strawberries), eggs, provalone, and turkey were about it, hence the reason my menu looks the same every day. So that means I'm going to have to be an adult and expand my palate. I'm so not in the mood for that.

(And frankly, I'm a little dubious about the whole allergy thing. I mean, for real, my dad has eaten Cheerios for breakfast for as long as I can remember, and he doesn't have an allergy to them. Heck, I was pretty much the same way with cereal--the type may have changed often, but it was still cereal, every day for breakfast, quite often for a snack as well. Maybe it's only certain foods that are more prone to allergy? I don't know. I need to do a little more research.)

Regardless, the news she gave me about my weight loss was encouraging. Two more pounds of water weight gone, 1.2 pounds of fat, and sadly, .5 pounds of muscle. Turns out--here's another nutritional nugget for you--when your body gets hungry and your blood sugar drops, it doesn't go after all the fat your body has stored. It goes after your muscle! No more justifying skipping meals for me. THe scale may say you're losing weight, but it's not the weight you want to lose.

Okay, so, I can't remember what I was last week, and frankly I'm too lazy to check at the moment, so I'll just tell you that I'm down to 158.6 pounds and 35.5% body fat. I was so happy to see that 5 in the tens column. :) We're getting there, slowly but surely....

Walking through the shadows

I know some of you have occasionally checked out the blog called "My Insides" that I used to have listed in my Links section. You'll notice it's gone because, as you may have already discovered, the blog itself was taken down. But since some of you were into reading it, I wanted to direct you to Katie's mom's blog where you can follow up on what's going on with them. In a nutshell, it ain't good. Please pray for Katie, her kids, and her family. Thanks.

Time to Curl Up...

...with another awesome book by one of my top favorite authors, Jodi Picoult! If you haven't yet experienced a Jodi novel, I greatly pity you and direct you to pick one up post haste. I would suggest "My Sister's Keeper" or "Keeping Faith." Her newest, "The Tenth Circle," incorporates a comic book that is being written by the main character--very very cool. I'm not that far in and I'm already hooked. Time to go read it and hopefully finish it so I can get on with the rest of my life; all else stops when new Jodi arrives....

Memory Lane

I'm in the process of cleaning the room that will soon become my own office. For months we've been stashing boxes in here, knowing the room wouldn't be used until Abby was born and I was ready to start writing again. Well, that time has come, but first I must clean.

There's a box in here filled with stuff that was originally in Abby's room. When we cleaned out her room, the box of stuff we needed to keep was put in here, so I'm going through it now to try to find homes for all the stuff inside. One of the items has floated from box to box, room to room, since 1992. It is my sophomore year (of high school) assignment notebook.

Why the deuce, you may be asking yourself, does she still have that?! I'm asking myself the same question, and you'd think that, since an answer is not easily determined, it would be no problem to toss it in the trash and be done with it. But I just can't do it. And I think it's because I'm a slave to my memories.

There are dot matrix-printed lyrics to worship songs taped to the inside cover, songs that we sang at the high school service at church. There are penciled hall passes with ink signatures from our choir director, perfect for getting access to anywhere, anytime at Rolling Meadows High School. And on nearly every page, especially in those useless address book pages in the back (who puts addresses in the back of a book meant only to last a year?) are notes back and forth between Meg Ryan and myself.

No, not that Meg Ryan. The Meg Ryan who is now Meg Gronau who just had Baby Eddie last week, as noted in the previous blog posting. Meg was my closest friend that year, and we both shared a passion for writing, not just in our assignment notebooks, but on stories that we co-wrote during study hall and lunch and other dead times during the day. She was--and still is--hilarious, and quirky in all the best ways, and very creative.

When I read those notes about silly things and mundane things and things that were riotously funny at the time but now mean nothing to me, I'm reminded of how simple life was then and how much possibly lay before us like a wide-open prairie. It reminds me of a time of less responsibility and more play, of a time when you got to see your friends every day because they were in classes with you and not thousands of miles away with jobs and husbands and kids. There were no paychecks to work for--unless you wanted to--no utilities to pay, groceries to buy, children to worry about. Will I get a date for Homecoming? a part in the musical? a decent grade on my geometry test? Oh, to have such trifling worries now!

So I guess that's why I can't just up and toss this ratty old book. It's not just the memroies themselves, it's the sense of freedom and anticipation about the future that they bring back to me. I read those notes, those assignment explanations and appointments, and I'm taken back to sixteen, a place that, for all its heartaches and life lessons, was not so bad. So the book will get put back in the box, or some other box where I can hide my memories so that, one day, Abby will have something to look at on a rainy day.

Abby is sprawled on my bed, lazily observing me as I fold the laundry. "Mom, tell me about when you were a kid."

I smile. "Kind of a broad topic. Which part?"

"I dunno. Whatever part you want."

I set another T-shirt on the pile as I consider her request, then remember the box on the shelf in the closet. "How about I give you a glimpse of my high school years?" I retrieve the box and set it beside Abby, who is now upright and eagerly removes the lid.

She rummages through the theater programs, birthday cards and newspaper clippings before removing a navy blue notebook. "What's this thing with the Greenpeace sticker on it?"

"Ah, that's my assignment notebook from my sophomore year."

Abby flips it open and inspects the front cover, then turns the pages slowly. "Why does it say 'Pippin' on October 18th? And whose handwriting is this all over your book? And what's a V-Show?"

I put down a sweater and smile. "Oh wow, my assignment book. I haven't seen that in years! Let's see...well, Pippin was the musical that year that I desperately wanted to be in but didn't audition for because I was too chicken...V-Show stands for Variety Show; it was the talent show they did a couple times a year, and I was in that. And the other person's handwriting was from my friend Meg..."

Christmas has left the building.

FINALLY! The Christmas tree and decorations have been put away. I can't believe it's the second week of March and we're just now doing this, but those of you with kids will I'm sure understand. Thing is, these last few days have been more wintery than December-February were. In fact, it's raining and hailing right now and there was snow on the lower hills this morning.

I also finally got up the energy and motivation to go through my closet and weed out the maternity clothes I no longer wear. I ended up finding a bag of clothes a friend gave me back when I was, oh, I dunno, maybe five months preggo. Best part is, it had a bunch of t-shirts and even a pair of pants that I can still wear! I was so relieved. I went jean shopping last week, a chore that is nerve-wracking and ego-destroying even at the best of times. After trying on about 14 pairs of jeans and khaki's, I managed to find one--ONE--pair of jeans that fit. It was so depressing. I need the weather to warm up FAST so I can start wearing shorts and skirts again.

Welcome Eddie!!!

Congratulations are in order for my friend Meg and her family--on Wednesday they welcomed Edward Cornelius into the world! Check out her blog for the full story and adorable pictures. If you haven't read her blog before, trust me, you'll want to keep it on your frequently visited list--she's a fantastic writer, probably the funniest person I've ever known, and just all-around cool.

Adventures at the Lake

Yeah, I know I didn't post my five week check in, but that's because I sucked last week. I didn't lose any weight (although my body fat went down to 35.5%, so that's a slight improvement) and I only walked 3 days. But my disappointment in my undisciplined self was greatly reduced today when I walked my first post-baby 15 minute mile! I was on my way to a second one but just barely missed it; still, 16 minutes (which two of yesterday's laps were as well) ain't nothin' to sneeze at.

Another first: I jogged. Now, granted, it was on a decline, and it probably would have taken more energy to hold myself back than to just give in, but darn if I didn't jog for a good twenty seconds or so during that last lap! My butt was in shock for a good half mile afterwards. It's sad when your trunk has so much junk that it follows the rest of your body about half a second behind--when the rest of me was up, it was down, and when the rest of me was down, it was up. But hey, I still count it as an impressive feat.

THis afternoon we're meeting my brother and his wife and taking our grandmother out for lunch at P.F. Chang's. I'm in for another week of poor eating, I know, but at least I've seen how much I can get away with before it's reflected in the scale. I'll stay away from the rice today and just stick to the honey shrimp. Mmmmm-mmmmm......

One Month Check In

Okay, I swear this isn't going to turn into Alison's Online Weight Watchers Blog--I just haven't had anything else to post about lately! My apologies to those who keep looking here in the hopes there will be something actually worth reading about. I promise to write something more interesting soon. :)

Week 4 Starting Stats:
weight: 164.2
body fat %: 36.5

Cheating: Yeah, a lot again. But I realized that things like ice cream and candy bars that once would have sounded sooooo good just don't anymore. Hallelujah. 'Course I did eat six Tagalong Girl Scout Cookies, 3 in two sittings. But even those didn't taste as good as I thought they would.

Week 4 Ending Stats:
weight: 161.6--2.6 pounds lost!
body fat %: 37.5--1% gained--but I so don't care. :)

TOTAL WEIGHT LOSS: 11 pounds! WOOHOO!!!!!!! And the best part? I can totally tell. The maternity pants I've been wearing really don't fit anymore--the waists are floppy. I can only wear two pairs now, which is awesome on one hand, but really sucks on the other because I obviously still can't wear my original clothes. So I have to do a little bit of shopping. But for once I don't care. I'm going to Old Navy with my mom on Tuesday to get some jeans, and I figure all I really need is one pair of khakis on top of that and I'll be fine. I've already invested in a couple new shirts and will get a few more since the majority of my maternity shirts are way too big now, too. Yay!

Week Three Check-In

Okay, I'm not even going to post all the times I cheated. Fact is, eating out is just part of our entertainment, and I'm not going to get away from it. So I'm just trying to eat smart and avoid (or drastically limit) the foods I shouldn't eat. And so far it's working!

Starting Stats:
weight: 166.8 lbs.
body fat: 37.0%

Exercise:
11 miles/3 hour, 40 minutes

Progress (DRUM ROLL PLEASE!):
current weight: 164.2 lbs.--2.6 pounds lost!
current body fat: 36.5%--half a percentage point lost!
TOTAL WEIGHT LOST: 8.4 pounds!

I went to the nutritionist on Wednesday and she said I've lost 3 pounds of fat so far--I'm so psyched. I don't care, though, what the weight is, water or fat--either way it's gonna make my clothes actually fit one of these days. If I can be as good as I was that first week, then I'll be back to normal in no time. Hallelujah!!

Last Guy On The Web

Back in 1994, our family was one of the first in our circle of friends to get email--but I think my dad is officially the last guy to get on the web. But the good news is, he's finally there--at LeeStrobel.com! Go check out his site and sign up for his newsletter. And check out the link for the preview for his Da Vinci Code curriculum--it's PHENOMENAL. And I'm not just saying that because I'm his daughter! I haven't read the book yet, but now I'm going to--and then hopefully find some folks to go through the study with me. :)

Week two check in!

Well, I thought for sure after all the cheating I did this week I'd end up gaining back everything I lost. I can't even remember all the stuff I ate that I shouldn't have--between dinner out (twice) with my parents and the time we were in Ventura/Santa Maria for Dan's grandmother's funeral, I ate restaurant fare and fast food more often than I ate at home. But I still lost a little weight!

Starting Stats:
weight: 168.0 lbs.
body fat: 37.0%

Cheating:
A lot.

Exercise:
5 miles/1 hour, 40 minutes

Progress (DRUM ROLL PLEASE!):
current weight: 166.8 lbs.--1.2 pounds lost!
current body fat: 37%--no change.

Yay!! :) I don't even care that it's barely over a pound; I'm just thrilled I didn't gain any back. :)

I didn't know disco was so international

I'm watching the Olympic opening ceremonies from last night--I recorded it so I could zip through the commercials. The creative program before the athletes' march was one of the bet I've seen in a long time--I loved that skiier figure made up of all those people! And the way the Olympic rings were formed at the end--so cool. But I have to say, I love their musical choices for during the march. The disco, the 80's dance (I'm only through the "N" countries, so who knows what they'll be playing by Zaire!)

The Olympics always make me cry. I cry through the opening ceremonies, I cry through the athletes' march, I cry during the medal presentations even when the US isn't on a podium. It's the thought of all the hard work, of the teamwork and camaraderie between the teammates, and the concept of representing your country that make me so weepy. I get that way with marching bands, too. I know, I'm a dork.

My next Internet stop will be NBC's Olympics page to figure out when all my favorite sports are on so I can set the DVR to record them all. Abby apparently already likes hockey; I had one of the women's games on this morning and she was staring in rapt attention at the TV. She did that the other night, too, while Dan watched the Denver Avalanche hockey game. Pretty funny. Dan would be thrilled if she was a hockey fan.

(Okay, I'm totally suckered in: did you see that Nike commercial where the US skiier, Bode, tells you to go to his website but doesn't say why? THAT will be my next stop, and then the NBC page. What can I say, he said to check it out, and I'm a follower.)

When the Olympics were here in LA back in...what was it, 88? 84? I can't remember...anyway, the marathon was run down here in Mission Viejo, and just two minutes away is Olympia Parkway, one of the roads they ran on. Kinda cool to think there were olympians right down the street from my house! Maybe someday it'll come back to LA and they'll do it again. Probably the closest I'll ever get to the games--those tickets are expensive!!

Let me know if I ever write a best-seller, will you?

Timetraveler.ytmnd.com

I don't even know what else to say.

Even better!!

You know how they say you should weigh yourself at the same time every day (or whenever you weigh yourself)? Well, the measurements I listed in my previous post were taken last night before bed--but I usually weigh myself before my shower. And guess what? When I did that this afternoon, I was 168! That means I've lost 4.6 pounds!! I know it's probably not likely, but IF I can keep that up, that means I'd be down to my target in about 3 months! BY SUMMER!!

Talk about motivating!...

Week One check in!

Well, I've been doing my new diet & exercise plan for one whole week now. Here's the lowdown:

Starting Stats:
weight: 172.6 lbs.
body fat: 39.5%

Cheating:
Super Bowl party (see Feb. 6 entry)
KFC (But I only had chicken strips! I WANTED extra crispy chicken breasts and mashed potatoes and a buttermilk roll--three cheers for willpower!)
McDonalds (But I only had chicken selects, 1/2 my fries, and 1/2 my Hi-C soda! I WANTED a quarter pounder with cheese and a Dr. Pepper and chocolate-dipped ice cream cone--three more cheers for willpower!)

Exercise:
14 miles/4 hours, 40 minutes (approx. 40 minutes a day)

Progress (DRUM ROLL PLEASE!):
current weight: 170.0 lbs.--2.6 pounds lost!
current body fat: 37%--2 percentage points lost!

YES! Measurable success!! Two pounds a week is fine by me. At this rate I will be at my target weight by the beginning of September. It sounds like it's a long way away, but at the rate time's going, it'll feel like, two weeks from now...

Goodbye, Gwen.

Grandma Gwen, Dan's maternal grandmother, died this morning. She was a dear woman, and I'm so glad I had the privilege of meeting her. Funeral is Friday. Please pray for Dan's family, especially his mother and aunts. Thanks.

Three and a half days wasn't bad...

Okay, so I went three full days of no cheating on the diet. But then we went to a Super Bowl Party...

Honestly, I was quite proud of my restraint. I only ate:

- 7 Cheez-Its
- 5 home made torilla chips
- 4 meatballs (at least they had protein!)
- 4 potato chips (but really thin ones!) with onion dip
- 6 apple slices (on my list of food I can eat, so that's good!)

Now, compare to what I normally would have eaten:

- a small bowl of Cheez-Its
- a plateful of home made chips, and after consuming I would have asked the woman who brought them how to make them, and then would have had Dan stop at the grocery store on the way home to get the ingredients
- 10 meatballs (they were covered in some kind of delicious sauce)
- 20 potato chips with a 1/2 a cup of dip
- two quessadilla slices
- 3 taquitos
- no apples whatsoever

So really, it was a huge victory. I was really kicking myself at first, but then it was kind of a challenge, a throwing down of the gauntlet to myeslf, to stop at only 5 of those tortilla chips and 4 potato chips & dip. Given the exercise I'm getting these days and how well I'm eating (last night aside) I don't think my little foray off the diet is going to be an issue. I mean, I'm all for discipline, but I don't want to turn into a total food nazi, right? Anyway, it's Monday morning, day 5, and I'm eating my strawberries and toasting my one slice of whole wheat before heading out to the lake to do my 45 minutes. 125 pounds, here I come!!!

Breaking the addiction

On Tuesday I went to the nutritionist my mom's been seeing. She's awesome--looks about 20 years younger than she really is and has MS but you'd never know it. Amazing what eating the right food will do for you! Anyway, my mom split her appointment with me so she could give me some advice on getting back into shape. I've been holding steady at 172 for almost two weeks, which is what she told my mom would happen because of my diet which, of course, sucks. She did a readout of my cells, my fat to muscle ratio, and some other stuff I can't remember. I wasn't as awful as I expected to be, but I'm certainly not where I should be, and while a lot of the reason is the pregnancy and its side effects, truth is I'm always a mess. Thing is, I'm realizing that Abby is one giant blank slate that is going to be filled by what she sees, and if she sees me living off cereal and fast food, how can I expect her to be any better? And after hearing the nutritionist explain what eating processed and simple sugar does to your body, I've decided I'm going to do my very best to make sure Abby doesn't get addicted to it the way I have.

So, to those ends, I launched a lifestyle change yesterday that I'm hoping and praying I'll be able to stick with. I'm eating a diabetic diet of about 1300 calories a day, plus two protein shakes a day on top of it, and I eat 6-7 times a day. I also started walking around the lake again; I'm starting at 30-45 minutes of walking time with the goal of working up to 4 miles in an hour. (Right now it takes me about half an hour to go one mile--thanks a lot, c-section.) The biggest challenge so far: not letting myself cave to my sugar craving. She said it would take about a week for me to break the addiction, and let me tell you, the pull of those Honey Nut Cheerios is just about unbearable right now. Might not seem like a big deal to let myself have one bowl a day--certainly it's less than my standard 2-3 bowls which made up about 80% of my daily dietm, right? But NO, I will NOT let myself do it! And I invite you to keep me accountable. I honestly think there should be a 12 step program for sugar addiction, but since there isn't, y'all have to serve as my sponsors. :) Feel free to check up on me; I promise to be honest!

Today is day two, and so far I have been strong. I threw out an entire box of my most favorite cookies last night, and finished off my Stove Top Stuffing Monday night. We're doing dinner with my grandmother tonight--we have a monthly KFC date with her--so I'll be off the diet a little but not too badly: chicken is part of my diet, and I'm going to have water instead of soda, and I'll bring my green beans and avocado instead of having the mashed potatoes and gravy. *sigh*

One day at a time, one hour at a time. Anyone who's ever broken an addiction and has some advice for me, please comment. I'm going to need all the help I can get!

The End of an Era

Well this will teach me to procrastinate. Western Union stopped sending telegrams on January 27th. I'm so bummed! I've always wanted to send a telegram, and now I'll never have the chance.

Three down...

So today marks the beginning of my fourth decade of life. I couldn't sleep last night after I fed Abby, and as I laid there staring at the ceiling I started thinking about how much has changed since my 20th birthday. Ten years ago today I was a sophomore at the U of I, dating the guy I thought I'd marry, looking forward to a year abroad in Scotland, addicted to an online roleplaying game, and expecting to be a teacher after I graduated. When I went home to visit my parents, I went to Arlington Heights, a suburb outside Chicago. I didn't have a car, I didn't own a house, I didn't have a job, I most definitely didn't have a baby. I slept on the bottom bunk of a 10 by 10 foot dorm room and did my homework on the floor while watching "Friends" and "ER." I think I had my birthday dinner at the Bombay Bicycle Club. Or maybe that was my 19th birthday. I can't remember.

I had my life very well planned out. (Silly, silly me.) I was going to graduate, get married, get a job as a teacher, and most likely have my first baby by 23 and my second a few years later. We'd live somewhere in the Chicago suburbs, have a house with a big yard, and...that was it. That was the dream I had for my life.

And God, I'm sure, was laughing at me.

Fast-forward ten years, and has any of that happened as I expected? Not at all. Instead, God rained down blessings far greater than any I could have anticipated or even hoped for. When the dreams I had 10 years go started to fall apart and fade away, I was so sad, so frustrated--I had put so much effort and time into building those dreams! How could they just crumble like that? I knew there were obviously lots of other wonderful things that could happen to me, but I wanted the wonderful things I'd come up with--because I of course knew what was best for me, right?

A gorgeous baby at 30, a home in California, a husband more perfect than I could ever have hoped for, and a career as a writer--not the life I planned but definitely a better one. The last ten years have brought with them a lot of unexpected change, a lot of unexpected opportunities, and some of the best and worst experiences of my life. Looking forward to the next 10 years makes me wonder what else God has in store...

"Not in my town."

Have you ever found out something was happening close to your home that absolutely disgusted you? I had that experience today. Lisa Samson had a link to Protest4.com , the website for an organization devoted to ended human sex trafficking, and I decided to check out the link. One of the articles listed was about the 12 US cities that are hubs for child trafficking--and one of them was Anaheim, CA. Yes, the home of Disneyland, the Happiest Place on Earth, and a city less than half an hour away from me that I'm in all the time. I couldn't believe that such a small city (compared to the other cities on the list, like LA and San Francisco and Las Vegas) with so much wealth could harbor such a dirty secret. It makes me ill.

So I'm doing something about it. Their "Get Involved!" page said they needed volunteers, and listed "writers" among the types of people they're looking for. I wrote them and am just waiting to hear what I can do, besides driving up there and grabbing off the street every lone girl I see.

One of the other things that really got to me was a quote from the mother of one of these girls:

"You sit down and talk to your kids about drugs, but you never talk to your kids about the possibility of prostitution," she said. "It's just not part of your world."

Does it scare anyone else to think that we need to be talking to our children (note it says CHILDREN, not GIRLS) about not becoming a prostitute? How on earth do you even start that conversation???

I'm not going to think about that right now. Instead, I'm going to start brainstorming a novel that touches on this topic. The more attention we draw to this travesty, the better.

Ah-ha!

I feel exonerated! These books all had less than 50% chance of being a bestseller:
A Tree Grows in Brooklyn--10.2%
The Cae for Christ--35.9%
White Oleander--41.4%
The Bridges of Madison county--35.9%
Tuesdays With Morrie--45.6%
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone--45.6%
The Da Vinci Code--39.5%
Pet cemetery--35.9%

So I think I'm probably okay, don't you think?

Well no wonder.

The Lulu Titlescorer tells you how likely your book's title is to make it a bestseller. Turns out Worlds Collide only had a 10.2% chance--no wonder it hasn't sold into royalty yet! Unfortunately I am not that good at picking titles, apparently, since Violette Between only has a 14.6% chance. Hm. At least I know where to go now to test drive my titles before making my final decision. (And yeah, yeah, I know it's all in fun...but I'm still going to run some bestseller titles through it to see how well they score. Just in case.)

The whole truth...sort of

Have you seen all the buzz about James Frey's book, "A Million Little Pieces?" Apparently he wrote his memoirs and took some creative license with a few of the rather important facts. Now there's a debate raging about the necessity of truth in memoirs--and frankly, the very fact that there's a debate at all shows us just how badly society is crumbling--with one side saying that memoirs fall under the genre umbrella of non-fiction and should therefore be all truth, and the other side saying that a little embellishment is really no big deal when the majority of the story is true to real life.

I'm getting ready to start my first non-fiction work, and not far behind it is my own memoir attempt. The first work will be about other people, and I don't foresee having a problem sticking to the facts with that one. But I have to admit that, while I don't condone what he did, I can certainly understand where Frey was coming from. When I think about some of the things I'll have to admit in order to stay true to my life, I get a little worried. Do I really want to admit to it all? Do I really want to give complete strangers an unflinching full-frontal view of my shortcomings, my stupidity, my immaturity? And what about other people whose lives figure into my story--is it fair to expose them as well? I guess I could give them the option of being shielded with the whole "Names have been changed to protect the innocent" concept.

And then what about the not-so-exciting facts, the mundane parts of the story that would be a lot more interesting with a few twists and exaggerations? Part of me thinks my story is way too lame for anyone to consider riveting reading--will I be able to withstand the temptation to give into hyperbole? Not much, just a few instances here or there that wouldn't have any bearing on the bulk of the story. Because, really, can you expect a fiction writer to refrain from fiction ALL the time?

Obviously the answer is yes, you can, and you should. And obviously I'm not going to let myself give into that temptation--I can't even blame a few embellishments here and there on a fuzzy memory because I actually wrote every night in a diary during the year abroad that I'll be chronicling. But I can guarantee I'll be wincing as I write and really wishing that truth was a gray as some people would like it to be.

Michael Frey's deception was wrong, minor thought it might be--but I can definitely understand why he did it.

A little preoccupied at the moment...

It may be awhile before I post regularly again on this blog--we had our baby last week and I'm a bit wrapped up in staring in wonder at my daughter. :) Check out my baby blog for all the details and the cutest pictures ever. :)

-Alison